MEET THE CREW

🍌 This isn’t a dev team — it’s a bar fight in a jungle, powered by booze, smoke, and pure meme momentum.

Introducing the holy trinity of $WASTED: three apes, zero credentials, infinite party energy.

🐒 YOLO – Head of Spontaneous Financial Decisions

Drug of Choice: Tequila shots and poor judgment
Vibe: Blacked out and bullish
YOLO once funneled an entire 40oz and launched a token by headbutting the keyboard.
He makes big moves after his 6th drink — and bigger mistakes after his 7th.

🍻 Skills:

Shotgunning beers while approving MetaMask

Mixing Four Loko with moon math

“Rugging prevention via chugging”

🐒 FUD – Chief Panic Officer (CPO)

Drug of Choice: Chain-smoking jungle cigs & energy drinks
Vibe: Sweaty palms, nicotine breath, full paranoia
FUD chain-smokes every time the price dips 0.2%.
He’s convinced the market is out to get him — and he’s probably right, but also very, very high-strung.

🚬 Skills:

Blowing vape clouds big enough to hide from taxes

Screaming “IT’S A SCAM” mid-puff

Writing panic threads while double-fisting Monster and Marlboros

🐒 HODL – VP of Never Letting Go

Drug of Choice: That sticky-icky jungle gas
Vibe: Floating on a hammock of kush and denial
HODL hasn't moved in days. He’s spiritually invested in holding — and physically glued to his beanbag.
He once missed an airdrop because he thought his wallet was a coconut.

🌿 Skills:

Rolling joints the size of a ledger

Hotboxing the DAO

Meditating through price crashes with Bob Marley on loop

💬 Final Words from the Crew:

YOLO: “Dude, I bought the dip. And a blender.”
FUD: “Why is everything red? Is that bad? I need a smoke.”
HODL: “...pass the banana bong, bro.”